Monday, March 22, 2010

mother's instinct

I need to write about this incident that occurred yesterday, Sunday afternoon, in the hope that I'll feel a little better about what happened. Not being selfish just working through this.

My beautiful seven year old little man was invited to a school friend's eighth birthday party. They have known each other since they started three year old kindergarten, many years ago. Kids love the opportunity to attend a birthday party. Mine are no different.

So excited was Master Seven when he pulled the party invite from his school satchel. Reading the details I immediately started thinking, this party is not aged appropriate - 'timezone'. I'm standing there reading the invitation and as eager as can be he is asking if he can go. I can't remember my exact reply but it was along the lines of needing to check mum and dad's work rosters. We both work some crazy hours at times and both the occasional weekend. He was happy with my response.

For the next few days, the party invitation kept popping into my head. Occasionally he'd mention it. I chatted to another parent who felt the same. I eventually made the decision (although my gut was clearly not hundred per cent happy with it) that he could attend in my presence. I was reluctant on the idea but he was so keen to join his friends.

Sunday arrived and we drove the 30 minutes or so to a part of Melbourne I am less than familiar with. Eventually finding our way to 'timezone'. Oh, I've just realised I haven't explained 'timezone', arcade type games and the laserquest games. It was a two hour party. I stayed on site with other parents.

The kids all seemed to be having fun, enjoying themselves. Master Seven particularly enjoying the ten pin bowling. With only about 30 minutes to go until the conclusion of the party it was time to play the laserquest game. I felt uncomfortable. I couldn't join him as he entered the dark room to play the laserquest game, at which point he was smacked on the head with a laser gun, in the dark. Me on the outside and unaware of his injury. I'm not sure exactly how long he was in there, about ten minutes at a guess. He came out white as a ghost, blood on his forehead. I'm not good around blood, immediately feeling faint and nausea. Some parents with much stronger stomachs than mine were brilliant in attending to him. Calming him, cleaning his wound and applying some band aids.

Not long after the incident we left, the party was over. Master Seven carrying a decent gash to his forehead. Driving away I decided we needed to see a doctor, I needed a doctor to have a look. He needed to give his opinion. To avoid hours in the emergency department at a public hospital I decided we'd head to a private hospital's emergency department. It was busy, it was Sunday night, about 6.30pm. We waited and we waited, as you do in an emergency department of a hospital. Master Seven was highly spirited, although thirsty and hungry. Following the nothing to eat or drink before seeing the doctor rule. 'Dad' came to join us. His presence instantly lifted my spirits. He was here to support us and be with us. What a difference it made having him there. He is so much better and stronger than I in his ability to cope with a variety of situations. Master Seven chatted and fired endless questions, as only he can, until after close to two hours of waiting we were called to the cubicle. Finally a doctor was going to have a look at this gash.

The doctor was just lovely. He did an excellent job at making Master Seven and I feel comfortable. His opinion, glue the affected area, cover with some medical strips and clear glad wrap like covering, keep dry for five days, no sport, no swimming and come back Friday morning for a reassessment. My main concern the scaring, the long term scar that could potentially be an unwanted reminder of what happened. The doctor's advice to give it a year and half to heal at which time if we aren't happy a plastic surgeon can be consulted. Time will tell. I know Vitamin E does wonders when it comes to repairing scars, I'll be applying it rigorously.

A number of things have left a bad taste in my mouth in relation to this incident. My instinct was that he shouldn't attend this party. As far as I understand it was a somewhat deliberate 'accident'. The mother of the other child hasn't approached me about the incident. I need to accept people are different and don't think the same as I would in this situation. I'm just hoping he isn't left with a nasty and obvious scar.

What a lesson this has taught me, next time if my mother's instinct tells me no, not suitable or not age appropriate I'm standing up to what I believe in, regardless of other parent influences and opinions and the demands of my children.

What a day! What a way to finish off the weekend.

Thanks for reading and (listening) to my story :)


  1. Oh your poor little man! I would have felt the same - Timezone (with your supervision) is one thing but laser games would be a bit scary/dangerous for littlies. Good on you for going along to the party too. Hopefully if you keep applying something like Bio Oil you'll find it won't scar. Hope you have a better week after the weekend's incident x

  2. My goodness
    That certainly must have been an ordeal for both you and master seven.. mind you it might buy you some leverage next time he wants to attend something you prefer he doesn't [got to be some upside]..

    You know I'm not a mother.. but that instinctual feeling one gets should be listened to... even if it seems silly... sometimes we try to explain too much away with logic... Glad all worked out well in the end.. I think you were probably quite brave .. I'm sure if no one else was there you would have taken charge... Oh and about the scare.. my niece has a scare on her forehead from a childhood incident.. still to this day she calls it her 'Frank' [frankenstein]... it shrunk over time so hopefully his will too.. Take care...

  3. Oh you poor things! I detest those situations where you feel so torn... and it's very unfortunate when their friends' parents aren't on the same page, it really does make things difficult.
    We had a similar episode last weekend, I also had that feeling in my gut, but went against it. Never again... My little one ended up with her knee cut open, and other children were injured, and no other parents stayed!
    Sorry your little bloke was injured, they are so strong though you will be more scarred than him! I always am with my girls!
    I am listening to my instincts from now on too...

  4. You poor thing, it sounds upsetting. Mother's instinct can be a powerful thing. Just try and remember too, that being banged up is part of a kid's life and helps them learn their boundaries and prepare them for the real world, where not everything is fair. A tough lesson at seven though. xx

  5. Oh, you poor thing - and your poor boy - how awful for him. Those gut instincts sure are powerful - wish they'd force us to listen more often. Good on you for staying, and I second the bio-oil - amazing stuff.

  6. Hello my lovely friends, I'd just like to say a big thank you to you all for your comments and support here.
    Thank you for taking the time to read my 'story' and to offer such genuine support. You have no idea how much I appreciate it. Thank you. I'm so glad we've 'met'. xx


Related Posts with Thumbnails